Davis Love III To Change Name By Deed Poll

By Ron for golfcentraldaily.com

Former PGA Champion Davis Love III shocked all six of his fans by this morning by announcing he is set to change his name.  The Georgia resident has made provision to legally assume a new surname in 2015, just prior to his Champions Tour debut.

Barry-White-The-Right-Night-Barry-White Speaking at a hastily convened press conference this morning the ex Ryder Cup Captain spoke of the factors influencing his decision.

“You know people think just because my name is ‘Love’ that I’m some sort of Barry White, a sex’d up Walrus Of Love or something.  I’m not. I don’t even own a satin night gown, and every so often I get so angry, I have no love left.  I’m a loveless wretch”.

“Also, I’ve always had to live in the shadow of my Grandpappy Davis Love I or “the very first” as he liked to be called and my dad Davis Love II or “Two point zero” as he called himself and that pisses me off”, said an emotional Love.  My name is lame compared to theirs. Some people now call me DL3; it sounds like some shit you spray on your car engine to get it to start on a cold morning”.

“And it’s not fair on my wife Robin either”, continued Love.  “The girls down the tennis club say she should be ‘giving love not robbin’ love’, which was mildly funny the first time but is wearing a bit thin after 15 years.  It’s also pretty hurtful seeing as we pay over $50,000 a year membership for the privilege of listening to those bitches”.

Asked what his new name would be Love said “I’m going to change it to Davis Hate in 2015.  I think by then Vijay Singh will be banned for life for injecting badger ball juice  in his tongue and there could be a big opening for a hate figure on the Champions Tour. Sabbatini won’t be eligible for a good 10 years so it ron[2] would be nice to play the villain for a while. I can always change it back when I’m done”.

It is unclear at present as to whether Davis Love’s brother Gay plans a similar change.

 

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