Rory McIlroy May Be Living In USA To Avoid Trip To Dentist Who Has Sent Out 20 Check Up Reminders

by Ron for golfcentraldaily.com
Rory McIlory’s Belfast based dentist Mark Conroy revealed today that he thinks the world number one golfer might be avoiding him out of fear.
“Like all dentists we have really annoying ways of reminding people to come in for a check-up, like a text message to their mobile number which they thought we didn’t have,” said Mr Conroy.  I’ve sent about 20 of those to Mr McIlroy informing him that his two monthly check for cavities and scraping was due.  I only charge £200, so that’s a paltry £1200 a year plus any work that needs doing. I think he might be avoiding me but I can’t for the life of me think why.”

Mr Conroy went on to reveal why he’s the most popular dentist in Belfast.  “I want to dispel the myth that dentists are evil pain inflicting bastards that get paid huge sums to do so.  I tell all my patients that brushing once a week is fine, should take no more than 10 seconds and that flossing is for pussies.  I say eat as much sugary shit as you can get your hands on.  And you know what? It works. My patients love me.  Look at my bookings on the computer screen. It’s packed!”
Asked whether he thinks he’ll ever see Rory McIlroy in his dentists chair again, Conroy remains philosophical, saying “Well he did get up and walk out half way through his last dental examination but he later tweeted to say his golf was hurting that day so I’m confident he’ll be back!”