Vijay Singh Sues Lord God Almighty For Breach Of Bible Promise
By Ron for golfcentraldaily.com
Related Story:Singh Letâs Down Entire Nation Of Fiji Who Now Have Only Crap Rugby Sevens Team To Believe In
Attorneys representing Vijay Suit have added The Lord God Almightyâs name to the already convoluted lawsuit filed against the PGA Tour and a Canadian stag.
Golfer Singh, is suing the Lord for $400,000 of lost earnings, on the basis that he âdeserted me in my hour of needâ.
According to the suit filed with the US Attorneyâs Office, God showed âabsolutely no mercyâ to Singh though CCTV cameras in his home clearly showed the Fijian prayed every night before going to sleep.
Lawyer for Singh, Saul Goodman told the media
"My client, Vijay Singh entered into this covenant with God in good faith. Mr Singh was assured by The Bible, that the Lord would provide Divine Mercy, Protection and Intervention in exchange for his devotion. âThe Lord will not forsake His people for His great nameâs sakeâ is just one of assurances I can recall off hand. Instead God has clearly breached the terms of the contract, by completely abandoning his child. Does Tim Finchem portraying my client as a deer sniffing version of Lance Armstrong sound like Mercy, Protection or Intervention to you? I think not.â
At time of writing, the Catholic hierarchy in Rome, who have never lost a case, are said to be taking Singhâs suit seriously.
Archbishop Todd Unctious, head of Romeâs legal division said âWe are prepared to through our annual budget of $7.8 trillion at this case. Weâve checked the record and there is no record of Vijay Singh being part of Godâs Tour flock. We have Watson, Fowler, Baddeley, Johnson, Ernst and a few others on our list but no Singh. And even if he is, we will go with the defence line that âGod works in mysterious waysâ which usually gets us off.â
More as it emerges.
Related Story:Singh Letâs Down Entire Nation Of Fiji Who Now Have Only Crap Rugby Sevens Team To Believe In
Attorneys representing Vijay Suit have added The Lord God Almightyâs name to the already convoluted lawsuit filed against the PGA Tour and a Canadian stag.
Golfer Singh, is suing the Lord for $400,000 of lost earnings, on the basis that he âdeserted me in my hour of needâ.
According to the suit filed with the US Attorneyâs Office, God showed âabsolutely no mercyâ to Singh though CCTV cameras in his home clearly showed the Fijian prayed every night before going to sleep.
Lawyer for Singh, Saul Goodman told the media
"My client, Vijay Singh entered into this covenant with God in good faith. Mr Singh was assured by The Bible, that the Lord would provide Divine Mercy, Protection and Intervention in exchange for his devotion. âThe Lord will not forsake His people for His great nameâs sakeâ is just one of assurances I can recall off hand. Instead God has clearly breached the terms of the contract, by completely abandoning his child. Does Tim Finchem portraying my client as a deer sniffing version of Lance Armstrong sound like Mercy, Protection or Intervention to you? I think not.â
At time of writing, the Catholic hierarchy in Rome, who have never lost a case, are said to be taking Singhâs suit seriously.
Archbishop Todd Unctious, head of Romeâs legal division said âWe are prepared to through our annual budget of $7.8 trillion at this case. Weâve checked the record and there is no record of Vijay Singh being part of Godâs Tour flock. We have Watson, Fowler, Baddeley, Johnson, Ernst and a few others on our list but no Singh. And even if he is, we will go with the defence line that âGod works in mysterious waysâ which usually gets us off.â
More as it emerges.
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